Today, for the last time.

I'm feeling a bit weepy...today, for the last time, we had this:

and this:

Yes, today was Andy's last first day of school.  He's a senior now.  Where has time gone?  I remember the first day of school in 1990.  I cried then too.  No, my boys weren't in school, but I was anticipating the day that did come...quickly, and now here we are, a junior and a senior, running from Mom as she requests that first day of school photo.

When we lived in our old house, we had a woman who lived across the street.  Each first day, Mary would come out to watch the kids leave.  She would comment on how big they were getting and then go back inside her house.  She never spoke again until the following September. 

Oh...what a trip down memory lane I'll take today!

 

 

 

It's good to be queen.

This is me walking down the stairs this morning:

It's not easy doing a self portrait that early in the morning, but trust me, you do not want to see me, pre coffee and contacts, wearing my pajamas, socks and slippers.  Believe me:  I am queen and it feels damn good.

From time to time, things fall into place in my life...all my fears and doubts melt away.  All things I believed to be true and right prove to be just so.  I am queen.

Of course, there is some degree of self arse kicking involved, but that's just life.  Anyone watch Oprah yesterday?  Greg B (can't remember his last name), author of He's Just Not That Into You was on.  Loved it except for the times I was kicking myself in the behiney because I didn't put those words on paper and write the book myself when I had the revelation. 

During the show, I called my friend Joy, who is smart, educated, pretty, funny, interesting and wasting her time with a man who is just not into her.  She was crying, not out of sadness as much as out of relief.  She said she felt like she had been suffering from a strange disease for years and feared the worst.  Now she had a diagnosis.  He was just not that into her!  I think she'll live. I'm going to lend her my crown this afternoon.

Life clicked into place.  All those unresolved relationships in the past, my first marriage that I let end without fighting back, all that crap going on during my single years can be explained with the statement, he just wasn't that into me.

This should be manditory for all single people, men and women.  Women need to memorize the vital signs, men need to know we know and vice versa...

We are women, hear us roar!

What's that? you don't have a tiara to wear down the stairs in the morning?  Get one!  Get them for your daughters too.  My daughter has one (a gift from her ever loving mom) that she wears when she cleans on Saturdays.  I have been known to wear mine to the bank or the grocery store.  When people stare at me, I explain:  I am queen.

Some women get it.  They smile.  Others don't.  They move away.  The way I see it is this:  you can either be queenor you can not.  You can choose, but why wouldn't you be?

My royal coffee perks.  Today is my baby's 17th birthday.  We will celebrate, but most of all, I will hug him.  He's one of the loves of my life.  I have many, but after all, I am queen.

I will edit this entry later to include a photo of Tony on his special day.  For now, I will have coffee and work on the sign for above my kitchen door.  It will read:  The Queen Lives Here!

Peace!

Jan

Oh geeze, where do I start?

Let's start with the weekend:

What appears to be a big, burned spot in my front yard is just that...a big, burned spot in my front yard.

We have/had a nest of yellow jackets on the front hill.  Mark was stung on Sunday morning.  On Sunday night, recalling the old, tried and true method of eradicating them, wait until they re-enter the nest at night and then pour kerosene on them and light them.  Easy enough?

Point 1: we only had gasoline

Point 2:  Mark asked Tony to help him

Point 3:  Tony said yes

So Mark, the boy genius that he is, lit a paper towel and handed it to Tony BEFORE he poured the gasoline.  Paper towels burn fast, you know...

So when the flames licked at Tony's fingers, he threw the towel.  Mark, in yet another moment of insanity, tried to deflect it (it would not have hit him) with the hand holding the gas can.  The gas that sloshed out when he swung it, caught on fire.  Mark threw the gas can down the hill. 

You know the sound that gas set on fire makes?  Boosh?

The bees?  I haven't seen them.  I think they died laughing.  I know our neighbors did.

Now for the rest of my life:

Today's bounty!

What I WAS knitting.

As far as I got on my next doll.

What I'm reading and have been reading for three weeks.

As you can see, I'm in a blah.  The kids are going back to school, We will be going on vacation in a month, I'm hoping to leave for Texas in two months.  I can't get moving.  I can't get motivated.  I pick things up and can't get moving. 

Someone kick me?

 

 

 

If you're happy and you know it...

How can you be in a bad mood when your grandson points out this:

in your mixing bowl in the morning?  Doesn't it look like a smile?

 

What next?

Well, if the past two days have been any indication of things to come, I am going back to bed and pull the covers over my head.

Wednesday, Andy went to help a friend.  This sweet man just got out of the hospital that day and needed some yard work done.  Andy went to his house after work.  We didn't expect him to come home until 8, so when he pulled up at 6, we thought something was wrong.

How true.  While using the electric hedge clippers, he managed to cut through his fingernail and into his finger.

G-r-oooo-s-s!  Mark looked at it, decided that nothing could be done other than clean it and wait for the loose part to detach and fall off. 

Note:  I did not want to look.  I can face any crisis.  If YOU came to me with your hand in a basket, I'd know what to do and do it without hesitation.  When it is one of my kids, chances are you'll have to push my head between my knees before giving him medical attention.

I did look and we made a trip to the drug store (ever notice that even if you have a fully stocked first aid kit, you always need something?), this time for a metal finger protector and Sponge Bob bandaids.

Once done, I heard Mark ask Andy what a '9 foot, tunnel hull, wooden boat' was.  Andy didn't know, but once he realized it was an ad in the paper, he was on the phone.  Within 90 minutes, he was the proud owner of yet another boat...this one was indeed 9 feet long.

Add that to our fleet.  We now possess a 23 foot sailboat that is currently at the marina, several (and I don't remember how many, it changes from day to day) kayaks, a row boat and a wind surfer.  I guess we sold a canoe, but I don't remember when. 

It's cute and it has a history.  It was designed and built by the seller in the mid or early 80's.  When they met to do the paperwork, the man brought along a copy of the plans he typed, photo copied and sold.  He also brought along clippings from Popular Mechanics, Boat World and a German magazine, complete with photos of THIS boat!

It's now in our garage. It was too dark last night when they brought it home to photograph, but I'll be sure to get one today.

Not to be outdone, Tony came home from work last night with a new mountain bike...

As I said before...what next?

Is this what back yards are for?

Last night Mark wandered into the back yard and came out bearing gifts:

No, that is not a cherry tomato, it's just ... stunted?

This is the second tomato and pepper we've harvested.  The first tomato was eaten (by me) in one bite.  The pepper went to my FIL.  Oh...the work of a farmer is never done.

PS...I ate the tomato with eggs...mmmmm!

 

At least someone likes them!

While waiting for me to ship her out to her new owners, Carolina was sitting on the table, just minding her own business.  I walked into the room to see this:

I guess Race Car really, really likes her!

Let's Hear it for the Girls!

Well, they made it home yesterday, proudly wearing their red ribbons and handing me over the check...for $4 total.  Yes, each one of the girls earned the tidy sum of $2. 

Come and meet them:

Here's Belinda.  You may remember meeting her when she was in the process of getting her hair done.

She sure looks different in her hand knit sweater and coordinated knickers, not to mention her smart accessories, doesn't she? Guess that's the only knitting seen on this blog in a while...

Here's Carolina, she's painted muslin, something I haven't done very often.  It's fun, but takes time and the results aren't always what I want.  She's cute, though.

And here's a close up of her face.  She does have a sweet expression, something you don't find on my dolls very often!

Yesterday was one of those days.  Mark's brother and one of his sisters did help with his dad so Mark was able to do some family things.  This is the first weekend we've had in I can't remember how many.  Friday night he took me out to dinner.  Saturday night he went golfing with Tony and yesterday he and Andy went to Erie for a Jeep rally.

I did end up going to the outlet mall with Tony...he loves to shop!  After 2394729347 stores, I did manage to find a potato ricer, something that has been on my wish list for years.

We had a great family dinner together.  Today is back to normal. Mark is staying with his father tonight and tomorrow.  On Wednesday, his sister is supposed to come in from New Jersey for a few days, so he'll get to come home.

Tonight dinner will be late since Tony works until 8...but it's just the three of us.

 

 

I'm fruity?

My name is Jan and I'm addicted to taking those dumb quizzes:
What color of sock yarn do you prefer?
brought to you by Quizilla

I've lost my ability to multi-task?!?

Okay, who knows what this is?

I'll give you a hint...it's in my kitchen...the bubbles are CASCADING...

If you guessed that it's what happens when you are obsessing about your irresponsible sisters-in-law and your hen pecked brother-in-law and worrying about how close to the max stress level your DH can handle without a second heart attack before the age of 48 while you are cleaning the kitchen, you are close.

If you guess that this is what happens when you fill the dishwasher with soft scrub (with bleach) instead of Cascade liquid (the bottles were side by side), an honest mistake:

See? 

Guess that proves that I have not worked on a doll or knitted anything in days.  Race Car, the newest cat, did dismantle a sock the other day...

I'm not as wierd as Jill?

 

You Are 20% Weird Not enough to scare other people... But sometimes you scare yourself. How Weird Are You?

two red ribbons and a deep fried pickle!

I know, it's been forever and sixteen minutes since I put anything decent into this blog...but it's not for trying!  Monday's entry was done in two stages, I had to have a little cry about missing' my daddy in between, and the final part has gone missing!  Fear not, I'll figure out what I did wrong and fix it!

Last night was strange...very strange.  Both boys worked until 8, so Mark and I sat here and ate dinner on the patio...alone.  Now in our younger days, a few hours alone and a meal would have rendered us tired as all get out because we'd end up having to go upstairs for a nap, but last night, with our new level of maturity, we just read the paper.  No sense getting all sweaty.

When the boys came home, we decided to toss some food down their gullets, shower them quickly and make a family outing of going to the Butler Farm Show to see the horses, chickens and pigs, sample some of the heart burn inducing food and of course, see how Mama's dolls made out in the judging.

Yes, at 4:21 on Sunday, I stood in line (deadline was 5:00) to enter two cloth dolls of my very own design.  Now in this land where sewing is what they call mending your jeans and replacin' buttons and tractor parking and hog raising are considered womanly arts, I didn't expect the judges to look upon dolls, ugly ones at that, favorably.  They didn't.  Well, they did, but they didn't know that Manfreds only do blue.  I got two red ribbons. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy...it could have been worse, but now I'll drive myself crazy trying to figure out what I didn't do right, or what i did do wrong...after all, last time I entered, five years ago, I did take the blue. 

My family was proud.  Mark even got upset because one of my dolls was displayed on the bottom shelf, not showing her face.  Cute.

Since we ate before leaving home, our food purchases were very limited, but I just had to try the deep fried dill pickles.  I was amazed...I am not even all that crazy about 'raw' ones, but the deep fried were very good.  Tony says we'll have to try them at home some day.  After the pickles, though, we decided not to go for the deep fried Oreos or Ding Dongs...just lost my courage.

Mark was home for a few hours this afternoon and then went to spend the night with his father.  Dad had a very bad day yesterday and constant dental problems make it even worse.  Mark has already announced that he will be there tonight and tomorrow night (I made a salmon loaf and sent it down for Mark to cook tomorrow), but he will not be able to spend the weekend.  Someone else will have to do it (but they will most likely say that Dad didn't want them to stay). 

After watching Mark in tears of frustration this weekend, I am proud to say that he wrote to his five siblings and asked them to help.  He can't assume all of Dad's emotional and physical needs.  I can't wait to see what happens.  The last person who spoke their mind to that group was me...that was two years ago and half of them never spoke to me again.

And now...without further ado...I'll share a few doll related photos and then wander into the kitchen in hopes of finding a cup of decaf.  Remember I love yuns...

Jan!

Belinda, who won a red ribbon, getting her hair done.

Oh, everyone asks, so I'll tell you: they are all made from Kunin Felt!

Maureen, who did not get to go to the farm show, shows off her blue ribbon for Prostate Cancer Awareness.

Flutter has been around for years. Her primary job is to swat at the dust bunnies, but Princess keeps an eye on her!

 

 

One year ago today, I sood on the side lines, cheering Tony's hockey team onto victory.  They won the championship in a cliff hanger.  We cheered, we laughed, we took pictures as they posed with their trophies and then I came home to say good bye to my friend and mentor and yes, my first love, my father.

I can't believe it's been a year since he died.  I can't believe he died.  I'm sure that if I turn my head quickly, I'll catch him standing in the shadows, watching to make sure I set the emergency brake in my car or turned off the lights and locked the doors.  As much as he watched over me, I can't believe that he finally trusted me enough to leave me alone.

It's not as though it were sudden or unexpected.  He left, in bits and pieces, over the last ten years of his life.  My father suffered from a form of dementia